the land in-between

'the wilderness where faith can thrive is the very desert where it can dry up and die.' - jeff manion


i went to a leadership conference in chicago a couple weeks ago. i navigated myself into the windy city and managed rush-hour traffic, parallel parking, and finding my own meals. i'm not a fan of eating alone, attending a conference alone, and exploring thrift stores alone, but i still managed to make the most of the experience.

one speaker - jeff manion - had me riveted. he spoke of this land in-between, this place that is neither here nor there, this place where we might feel lost or disconnected or uncertain. it can be an abrupt tragedy that brings it about, or it can just be a season of vague uncertainty. i currently subscribe to the latter camp. i am right there with the israelites: meandering through the wilderness, complaining at the drop of a hat, and wondering what the heck God is up to.

i have piles and piles of lofty, ambitious dreams and goals and hopes. and with the sun setting on 26, i realize time is not exactly on my side. there is no pause button to press while i sort this all out. i feel like God has put some passions inside of me, but i don't know what bridge i am suppose to take over these troubled, muddled waters. i intensely love writing, literature, poetry, words, semantics, layout, communication, etc. but how does that translate into my life? is it God or is it me whispering that i might have a shot at pursuing something of worth down that road? i love the nations, traveling, culture, anthropology, psychology, history, dynamics, community, simplicity, etc. but how does that translate into my life? i've got all these scraps of fabric in my hands, but i feel like i don't have the ability or the know-how to create something cohesive and functional out of the mess. and i'm getting tired of holding it all.

anyway, i digress.

some notes i took:

- the land between can become fertile ground for complaint and emotional meltdown (uhh.. yep).

- the land between can also become fertile ground for God's provision (He loves to provide, it's what He does).

- the land between can become fertile ground for God's discipline (for redemptive purposes - His discipline comes into play when He wants to RESCUE something).

- the land between can become fertile ground for transformational growth ("I need you to trust Me here").

- the israelites were not yet God's people out wandering in the wilderness. the wilderness is where they became God's people.


i could go one of two ways in this transitional time... i could become bitter and caustic, blaming God for all my uncertainties, or i could take this time to grow, to welcome the burdens and give them up to God daily, trusting that He will show me a way out of this wilderness... when it's time.